letter........

daddy,

less than 24 hours ago I received the worst phone call anyone could ever get. With Mom crying on the other end, she said two words to me that re-play over and over in my mind. " Dad's Gone " I held my hand over my heart and cried out " No" I could not say anything else. My heart was breaking. I miss You.

As I sit in my bedroom writing to you, I am surrounded by all the "things" and "stuff" you have passed on to me. Reminders of our time spent together and also reminders to me about your childhood. I treasure every single item.

I feel the best way for me to express how much you ment to me is to put it in writing. I never wrote you many letters but I have every single one that you wrote to me. I'm not sure I had ever told you how much I looked forward to receiving a parcel from home and loooking for the letter first.Getting a note from you always made me smile. And, always with some tears because I missed you sooo much.

On this day, I am remembering the good times we shared. I have so many great memories of us together. I seemed to tag along with you everywhere.Tonight mom said " I was attached to you at the hip " This is true. I was Daddy's little Girl and usually where you were I was not far behind.

We had great times didn't we. All our trips into your camp where we would pack up the nap sack with our favorite foods and candies for me. Those long wals from the end of the pavement back then and from the Snowmobile lodge. Always with me either jabbering to you or singing.

Oh and trapping the muskrats. Those early mornings before dawn were not fun but tramping through the marsh was and me carrying out all the rats. I would even spend the evening with you in the barn while you were skinning them. I wanted to be with you during every step of the process.

Planting, fertilizing and pruning the Christmas trees, you teaching me how to drive a car, skipping rope with me in the evenings before bed when I was little. You even turned double rope for me. Taking me with you on the weekends when you were working on a house,making wreaths with you in the barn and pushing me on the swing set. There was a song we used to sing while swinging but right now, I can not think of the name of it. It will come to me in time, I'm sure.These are all great memories I have of us together and there are many, many more.

I was looking so forward to your trip to Manitoba this year. There was so many things I wasnted you to see and places I wanted to take you. And, even though you are not going to physically be here, when the weather turns nice I am still going to take you with me.

We are so simular in so many ways. Our love for chocolate, the outdoors, rainbows, the lakes and waterfalls and even simple things like bread and peanut butter and mom's molasses cookies.

There is so many things I should have shared with you, so many words I never got to say, and so many times I wanted to give you a huge hug to let you know how much I loved you. I miss you so much daddy it hurts me. I will take you with me through all the stages of my life.I will cherish all the memories we shared. I will always be your little girl.

love you,
Tan xoxo